In the Shadows
by POIphantomgirl
Summary: Darkness has been more than his home, it's been his prison. Can a beautiful Angel show him a way out? AU


**This is pretty AU. Anything you recognize obviously isn't mine. This one-shot is a twisted version on how John and Joss could've met.**

The door slid open with a gentle push. With two steps, she was inside, pausing to rest briefly against it now that it was closed. Exhaustion weighed heavily on her shoulders. She took a breath. Toeing off her shoes she moved towards the living room.

"Your home late Detective."

Heart plummeting, she had her firearm in her hands and raised in seconds. But as her ears recognized the voice her moment of panic drained away. In the distance, she made out a form, hidden in the shadows. Joss blinked.

He was here?

He was actually here. Less the ten feet from her. Standing in the shadows. Hiding in the darkness. As he always did.

And he was _here_. Where she could _see_ him if she wanted.

She had waited for this moment. Longer than she ever wanted to wait. And she had wanted this ever since that very first time he appeared. Meeting her in the darkness…

 _The cold hard ground was merciful. It was a bed of relief. A bed of comfort where she could rest her weak wet form. Her eyes stared into the blackness of the night sky. Her mouth wide, gasping. Hungrily she sucked in the polluted oxygen, grateful to be breathing again. She remembered blacking out, remembered her last coherent thought. Accepting death. Drowning. Then she remembered, just barely, a mouth against hers, breathing air back into her lungs._

 _She blinked trying to focus. Who saved her?_

 _"_ _Relax Detective. It's over." The voice wasn't familiar, but it was welcome. Like a blanket it spread a warmth down to her numb toes._

 _Slowly her vision focused enough to make out a man's silhouette. Her mouth went ajar in disbelief. It was him! She knew it was him. She fought her frustration. Finally, in the flesh the man she had been chasing for months. Just feet above and she couldn't even make out his face._

 _What did he want? This stranger, this twisted seeker of justice._

 _Why had he saved her? He had to have pulled her out of the water._

 _"_ _W-what…do you…want?"_

 _"_ _To set your mind at ease. Those punks who tried to kill you have been taken care of."_

 _"_ _Why?"_

 _He didn't answer and she didn't have the strength to move._

 _His hand reached out and his calloused thumb connected with her face. She flinched only afterward noting the gentleness in his touch. A gentleness that brought a sigh from the deep recesses of her soul. Although his hand was wet, it was warm enough to steal some of the chill away. He thumbed away a tear she hadn't even realized had fallen to mix with the wetness already on her face._

 _"_ _Perhaps next time you'll take my advice more seriously. I'm glad I made it in time." His fingers were still on her face. Still soft. A gentle caress. Almost as smooth and enticing as his voice. A voice she knew she wouldn't forget. "I told you I'm on your side Joss. You're not alone." His finger trailed her jaw before he pulled away with obvious reluctance. "I'll send help."_

 _He stood and was gone leaving her confused. Who was the man in the shadows? Had she misjudged him this entire time? And would she ever get the chance to see his face?_

…She remembered that night. Never went to sleep without thinking about it. Or how he kept his promise and sent her partner Fusco to assist and see her safely home. Or how he never left her alone. He called and offered her position with helping him. After that night she trusted him. Believed there was more to the man than she had thought.

Together they saved lives. They never met in person. Instead she operated in the day and the light, while he worked in the shadows and the dark. The only time their worlds crossed was when he called. And he called daily. He threw himself into her life. He invaded her home to leave her details for cases and a special phone for their communication. Always ducking out before she could see him. A few months into their new work effort things changed.

Right after he saved her son who had been kidnapped by one of her enemies. He managed to rescue and return him in one piece. Without ever showing her his face. He called her the moment he had Taylor safe and sound. She thought for certain all her waiting would end and he would deliver her boy in person. True disappointment settled in when his boss, Harold Finch brought her son home. He had outsmarted her again. Although he avoided face to face meetings their relationship still changed. They became closer, their relationship more personal.

That was when they started talking for no reason at all. About topics that had nothing to do with their work. Their lives, their pasts, their hopes, their dreams. She knew everything there was to know. Knew about the woman he once loved, the family he had lost, his birthday, his favorite color. Everything.

He even kept in touch with her son. And started leaving other gifts in her home. Flowers, firearms that she had wanted to add to her collection, jewelry. One time she came home and found dinner cooked and the table set with her favorite scented candles glowing.

Even while living in the shadows he, through those calls, through those simple actions, exposed more of his heart than she knew he ever intended. She found herself wanting to see the face of the man she started dreaming about at night. The face of the man who moved her with his heartbreaking story. The face of the man who was never threatened by who she was. Who knew all her secrets and still seemed to care. Who was shackled with guilt over his blood-stained past. Who felt he would never be free of the night.

The face of the man she loved.

It was the craziest thing she had ever done. Fall in love with a vigilant and one she had never seen. Others would say she had lost her mind and stooped to a new level of desperation, but in her heart, she knew he was not a killer. That the past year was not a trick or some sick ploy of his, meant to deceive her. She didn't have to see his face to know who he really was.

She could have taken what she knew and searched until she found an image. Until she found a face, but she could never do it. She wanted to see him because he wanted to let her in.

But she feared the darkness would always come between them. That she would never see his face. That he would never take a real chance on her. Never open himself up so their relationship could become even more.

Yet here he was. Standing in her home. Waiting for her.

Her heart pounded in her chest, her hands broke into a cold sweat. Her mouth was dry. He always did this to her. How much more, now that she was in his presence. It was a miracle she was still standing.

Swallowing, her hands lowered. "You could've told me you planned on stopping by."

She knew he was smirking. The past year had taught her how to interpret his silence and every nonverbal cue.

"I was afraid it would scare you away."

He said it as a joke, but in truth, it was he real fear. She took a step. Just one. If he wanted to reveal himself, he would have to.

"You've never given me a reason to run from you John. Why would that change now?"

He watched her. She felt slightly self-conscious. Although the lighting was dim, she was still exposed compared to him. He was in her home, but it felt like she was the one to invade his space. "So are you just going to stand there, or are you going to finally let me see you?"

He shifted his arm resting on the wall. He was hesitating.

She knew she was going to have to be cunning about this. He was afraid. So very afraid of her rejection and that gave her hope. Hope that her feelings were not one sided. "Is this how it's always going to be? Do you really feel like you have to hide from me John?"

A barely audible sigh escaped his mouth. "I'm not comfortable in the light Joss. I don't belong."

"Says who?" she challenged.

"Darkness has been a part of me so long."

"No John. You lost your way. You were tricked into thinking that wrong was right. But now, after all you've done, you're such a good man. Better than some of my peers that are supposed to uphold justice. You belong in the light."

"It's been so long Joss." She heard the fight in his voice.

John Reese watched her. The yellow glow brightening her beautiful face. Always in the light. She was his very own angel. A messenger sent from God to shine a little light his way. None of this was supposed to happen. He was never supposed to come to care for her. Much less love her. But like poison he just couldn't walk away. Couldn't stop coming back for more. He had to be near her. To hear her voice, to do things for her that caused a smile.

Then when she exposed her past, he couldn't help but expose his. He tried to convince himself that he did it at first to keep her from feeling awkward. But inwardly he knew that he was tired of bearing the weight of his past. Like the angel she was, she always listened. She always told him things he didn't want to hear. Words that his mind rejected, but his heart held tight to.

Saying he had made a mistake. That he had been deceived. That if he didn't have a heart, he wouldn't be helping people now. The words met him at night. In his sleep. Until he started to believe her.

For weeks, he had wrestled with coming to her. Wanting to destroy every wall that divided them. Wanting to be rid of his darkness. Wanting to find complete safety in her arms. But fear had held him back. Until finally her call to him couldn't be ignored and he went to her place and waited.

But now that the moment was on him, seeing her, he hesitated once more. Could he really do this? What if she was wrong about him?

Joss held out her hand. "Just take a few steps John. See it for yourself."

Her breath held and she stared at his form waiting. He wanted to. With all his heart she knew he wanted to, but he had to overcome the voice in his head. The voice from his past that told him he was no good and that he would _never_ be good. That he didn't deserve happiness.

She was right. It was all on him. Did he want to disappoint the angel looking at him with so much hope? Did he want to stay in the shadows?

Pushing from the wall he stood upright and took one step.

The light cast a glow on his dress shoes. Joss kept her hand extended, her heart ached to feel his hand. Another step and another.

His hand stretched and grasped hers. She seized it holding tight, his face still darkened with shadows. A few more steps and he was towering above her, his chin lowered to his chest. This close he couldn't look at her. Joss tugged his hand and pulled him just a little closer. His hair was black with beautiful strains of gray at the edges. With her free hand she slowly lifted his chin.

Her breath caught again for another reason. He was breathtaking. Those eyes. A beautiful blue with so much misery in their depths. She ran her hand over his dark eyebrows, her fingers tracing down his nose and across his cheekbones, down to his lips before cupping his cheek. He had closed his eyes basking in her touch. A tear slipped from the corner of his eye. One tear finally given freedom when so many more awaited, stored up from years of pain. She tenderly caught it with her finger and his lashes lifted.

His gaze hungrily ran over her face. "You're even more beautiful up close." He said.

She laughed resting her head against his for a moment. "I wish I could say the same about you. Unfortunately, I haven't had the real chance to see you from a distance." She continued to stroke his face not able to get enough. "But I _will_ say, you are a sight for sore eyes." They stood in silence heads touching, hands entangled. Finally, together, in the light. "This is the craziest thing I've ever done." She whispered.

"What? Befriend a vigilant?"

"No." She looked into his eyes. "Fall in love with one."

He swallowed, his eyes misting over. He couldn't breathe. Patience wearing thin Joss pulled him down for a kiss. She stretched on her toes, wrapping her arms firmly around his neck. The kiss was soft. Tender, but the way John melted into it, assured Joss that he had fallen just as hard as she. His hold tightened before she pulled away.

He placed a kiss between her eyes. "Don't ever leave me Joss. Please. No matter what happens. Don't leave me. I can't do this without you. I couldn't lose you-"

"Shh. I won't," she assured, holding him as she had always dreamed. "We'll fight the darkness together." Joss ran her hands up his back. He buried his face in her neck. They were lost in their own world, their own haven that no one could break up. "You're home now John. Nothing's going to change that."

 **Like I said it's AU. I figured if the Phantom of the Opera could make a girl crazy about him without ever seeing his face, why couldn't John Reese. LOL! Hope you enjoyed and thanks for all those who stopped by to take a look!**


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